Bugaria - "The gods must be crazy"

Bulgarians are very similar to the Italians. Except for one thing. While the Italians like to be at the top of there job, Bulgarians have no longing to work them self up. A Bulgarian man needs to hear every second hour, that some one loves him! What’s that? The women are more like the Germans. Strait headed and will slap you if you say anything against them but only when no one sees, in public they are the perfect wives! Like the German women, the officer uniform would dress them nicely.
The reason Bulgaria is not on the same level as the Scandinavian countries, is that they say they don’t need all the tools and stuff that the 21st century gave us! The result is that they fix, f.x cars, very well, but when they’re done, the modern world has already made dozen and sold them all at the same time! When they come to visit the modern world they shake there head and don’t understand why the people need all this things like: roof, hot water and a bathtub! They’re like Africans that sees a Coca-Cola bottle for the first time!
There culture is similar to the Russians; they go to war because they have a strong military, well, that’s what they think. At the same time they are fighting with swords and arrows, the enemy is sleeping while the missile has a timer.

Like the Turkish, they consider them selves as a European country. Well, they are geographically right. The fact is that the Scandinavian countries with UK and Germany really don’t need another Third World country to send there money to!

Well at least there national team is fun to watch, maybe except the game against Sweden 5-1?

And what about changing there flag… Green is so yesterday!

Good thing that came from Bulgaria.National football team 7 years ago.
Everything is cheap there.
Cheaper then to fly to Africa.

Italy - looks like a shoe!

All Italian men are just like hyper German women.
They are the most emotionally people in the world.
They do every thing slow and like it more when they are in control rather then working hard. When you are staying in Germany at least you can sleep on although you know the Germans are awake around 4 or something. In Italy there is no change sleeping late. There’s coming loud noise out of the Italians late into the night and again early in the morning, there’s now change of ignoring it! If you see a man dress lightly in very tide pants touching his balls every three minuets and haven’t shaved, that man is probably an Italian! I was ones told by and half Italian girl, that just couldn’t stop saying that here dad was so pretty, that every Italian man “a true Italian man “ has at least two women’s and will most likely cheat on at least one of them!

How can you be proud of a country the looks like a shoe? The Italian national football team is the only team in the world and the history of football that dresses in so tide uniforms that they attract more male fans because of there body then the international female team.

There Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi doesn’t have to fear bad publicity as he owns the media! Last time that happened in Europe was in the USSR before and during the WW2!

Acting as a prison guard in extermination camps in WW2 movie? That speech gave the ministers, that had to sit in every meeting at the European Union, there price.

The good things that came from Italia!
Pizza
Inter Milan
The leaning tower of Piza.
The sun!
Augustus imperator/Julius Cesar

England, "beauty" or just the beast?

I know a bunch of Englanders and they all have one in common, they can be very grumpy.
Englanders wish they where the only nation in the world, at least they would not care if some countries went missing. They find Americans annoying but do everything to please them. The story goes that all the beautiful woman where taken by the Vikings so all the ugly things were left behind.
Englanders think that they are the smartest people in the world. They only have to use things they can buy in England and then travel a lot to the Third World to get some proof that their country is the best.
When you go to the stores they are all polite, but don’t let them fool you, that’s only the language, they have absolutely no interest in the costumer. They only speak English, although I know some that have actually read other books from other countries and some even learned French, but these are people that have moved from UK or travel a lot.
Another story goes that when you go to England you go to shop and should beware of going to the pups. If that is you’re hobby, then Ireland is the nearest plays to go. Otherwise, you risk ending up with an English girl!
At least England has some history. English movies are plain bad, but their humor is good. And what is the deal about driving on the wrong side of the road? There is the proof that they will never take up the Euro.
English royalty is just doomed to fail. Well they have this one prince, prince William. When Charles got rid of Diana and divorced her, it just showed that nothing good and beautiful can stay there. Diana was indeed the very best thing that happened to England. The queen of the world.
So the only good thing about England is:
English football, especially Newcastle United.
Stoke city.
Prince William.
England’s history.
Alan Shearer!
Simon, but the Idol sucks!
And the fact that they are close to Ireland and Scotland!

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Denmark = I'm sorry

I lived for one year in that country but now I’m back, that should do it!

There are few things good about Denmark. They have this Tivoli and Christiana a fun “tourist” place. That’s about it!

Well… I have some friends over there, they are very fine.


First of all, they stole there flag. They would say to you that they got in a war as a gift from God! Ye right!!! They stole it from their enemies as they where fleeing!

Second of all, they don’t like Americans, well.. they don’t really like any foreigner in that matter.

I lived on a boarding school and one day we had a visit from some politician. He actually said that in no less then 10 years, Denmark could be as big as America is now! Well.. no comment!

Then a practice handball (football just opposite) after practice, all of the Danes (Danish) had a beer and smoked! What is that! Sports and smoking don’t go together!

It’s my meaning that Denmark was first fully independent after the WW2 because the German took over them. If not, then Iceland was independent around the year 900.

Here in my school, we have a Danish teacher that is sent from Denmark by the Danish government because in Iceland the government had this “fantastic” idea of teaching Danish because of the relationships these countries have had over the past years. But all this teacher does (like every other old people in DK) is preaching about how we should avoid U.S.A influence and the Scandinavian country (or as we call it, Norðurlöndin that is the Scandinavian countries with Iceland, Faeroe islands and Greenland included.) Should just stick together. Before these idea goes any further, that’s not going work.

Things you should stay away from in Denmark:
- Talking bad about Danish football.
- Only drink Carlsberg.
- You only look cool in Copenhagen if you wear a tide t-shirt and sunglasses. (If you are a guy)
- McDonalds.
- Never ever go into to small (for no more than 20 people) theaters! The shows are scary. “I’ve slept with her & my mom, and now when I’m god, I can sleep with myself,” Quote from one show I happened to see and never forget!
- Don’t expect to understand the English they speak!

Germany!?

Last Easter I went with some friends to Berlin. I respect Germans a lot but I found two things that just didn’t seem right. There were two things I wanted to do. 1. I wanted to shop and 2. wanted to see something from the WW2.

When I had spent over 3 hours trying to find a shop, I went with my friend to the next information center.

Me: Hi, I’m looking for a shopping center. Do you speak any English?

German woman: Yes little bit! You go #$%&T$##... (some thing in german)

Ok. I have always found german to be nice language, but when you (at least I) go to an information center for tourists! You expect them to speak English, that just how it is!

It took me a whole day to find anything about the war! I don’t thing Germans should feel “ashamed” about the past! I would think that the war would be the biggest tourist attraction. I think that even trough it was a terrible war, it changed the world to it's better!

German women.
Ever since I went first to Germany, I’ve been afraid of german women.
They really don’t like children, maybe that’s just a culture thing? Now a have three german (women) friends, and they are fantastic. So I guess you’ll have to live in Germany to keep this part of the culture!
Mothers, keep your children away from them!

German “hobby” sellers!
These people are the scariest thing in the world right after icelandic cleaning ladies!
I went in to one of these stores, they where selling old things, f.x. old hats and stars from the war. They just stared at me like they wanted me to go out. Just for fun, I stayed as long as I wanted and even touched things. It almost made them angry! ;=)
Be aware of them!

And one more thing. Be aware of the german police! If you need any help, use the construction workers. They are the only hope Germany has!